I’m not JUST a mom

I shop at Wal-Mart, and do just as my DH says: when I go shopping, I leave him on ‘Snore Patrol’ (children can be quite rambunctious in their sleep), and he tells me to ‘take as long as I need.’ I do just that! He’s fortunate that I shop at Wal-Mart and not Nordstrom. I could do some financial damage there!

I love being able to say to others, “Go ahead of me. I have all the time in the world.” I get such positive benefits from being considerate, even if my shopping trips to Wal-Mart are the only points in my life where I do not seem pressed for time. I feel free to stop and visit with other folks, especially those with children up past what I would consider a normal bedtime. Not judging, I promise. It takes a lot of work to get your child’s circadian rhythms in tune with early bedtimes. The Fall time change has been a big help for me in the past.

So when I was speaking with another mother at Wal-Mart recently, she mentioned her 3 year old son, but continued speaking of her career, her coworkers and her boss. Then I got the question I used to dread: “So that do you do for a living?” When I hesitated to respond, trying to formulate a succinct answer, she filled in the blank for me. “Let me guess. You’re wearing khaki pants, a stained tee, tennis shoes, and no makeup. I’d guess you stay home with your kids all day.” That statement took almost no thought to react respond to. “Actually, I do quite a bit while I’m at home with my children, and I do have three girls, ages 6,5 and 2. They are actually boys in floral prints. I have a blog, titled Family Circus, and I’ve looked for a doorbell that plays Wringling Brothers’ theme music.” I almost blurted it, all in one breath! The mother said, “Well, Bless your heart!” I’ve heard that statement too many times in my life to mistake it for compassion! While I had a list of daily duties that I was prepared to spit at the woman, I quickly decided to move on. The man behind the Deli counter handed me the smoked cheddar I had requested, and I walked away. I realized that I was not angry, just frustrated at how many people, how many mothers consider stay-at-home mothers not a real contribution to society. I think all mothers influence society by raising our next generation! Women who are SAHMs work the equivalent of two full-time jobs, often without help. I have the privilege of knowing firsthand what some the many hats are that a stay-at-home mom has to wear each day:

  • Concierge
  • Full-time Chef
  • chauffeur service: school/activities
  • Full-service maid
  • Daycare/Preschool Teacher
  • Tutor for older kids
  • Garbage/Recycling Guru
  • Crayon/watercolor Aficionado
  • Household manager
  • Nurse
  • Sexy Wife

This list barely covers the bases. I love it when Dr. Phil goes off on a husband/father who doesn’t appreciate the effort that goes into caring for their own offspring each day. I’m so blessed to have a husband that once remarked to me, when we brought our first daughter home, “It’s okay to step over a basket of dirty laundry to pick a crying baby.” I know that I’ll never need ‘Tell it Like It Is Phil’ to set my hubby straight. He really is my Prince Charming. That’s him in the picture with Catie, 1 day old, five years ago.



  1. justin said,

    October 12, 2005 at 4:05 pm

    There is no such thing as JUST a mom.
    Every mom who cares for her children to the best of her ability is a SUPER mom.

  2. Simone said,

    October 13, 2005 at 1:22 pm

    You’re a woman after my own heart. There is nothing better, more enjoyable, more rewarding than staying at home to look after and raise your kids. They need constant love and security that can only come from a mum and dad. I never get angry when people look down on me. You have the right to feel secure in God’s calling on your life. If you have kids, that calling is looking after that. Feel confident and love being able to say that your a SAHM!

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